The normally upbeat, straight-backed man
sat looking at Alicia with a slight slump
and some considerable sorrow in his eyes. On the desk in front of him was his resignation letter.
“I have to resign. The relationship between me and the CEO has become unbearable. I can’t get through to him, he won’t listen and he’s surrounded by cronies who just repeat what he says.”
At 43, Kennard was the US-educated head of the sportswear division of one of Asia’s largest clothing manufacturers and had been a rising star in the company, tipped to be the CEO himself one day.
As a consultant to the company and Kennard’s Executive Coach, Alicia persuaded him to file the letter for a while and work with her on some techniques for influencing Kennard’s boss.
Kennard is by no means alone in feeling that he can’t get through to his superior. In our work with major companies over the last 20 years, we have found that this lack of good upward communication is one of the greatest and most unrecognized blocks to good corporate performance.
Perhaps, the greatest mistake people make when trying to influence or manage upward is based on the mistaken—and often unconscious—assumption that your relationship with someone you report to is intrinsically different from any other. It’s not. To the brain, all relationships are the same, both inside and outside the workplace. This is true with your boss, your client or customer, your life partner and even your dog (who has a not-too dissimilar brain to a human).
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